I’ve been in a rather dark, pressure-filled place in my journey the past couple of weeks. You can tell, more posts here about my feelings, rather than code. Less posting on Twitter about anything work-related, or anything at all during the work week. The usual “How are you?” is greeted with an exasperated sigh, rather than my usual “Life is awesome!”
It’s something to do with another level I’m trying to attain in my career, a lack of balance, a frustration with not being able to do what I wish I could. Many have tried to help me out of this funk, and just as I start to feel better, another monkey wrench is thrown my way. My medical problems — I can deal with. High blood pressure, take a pill. Leaking protein – take some chemo. Fine. But this general discomfort is hard. I don’t know the end goal, nor the path. I’m horrible at hiding my emotions, so I say things I shouldn’t, things I don’t truly mean. I hope the team knows that. (more…)
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